你愛追求完美嗎？
“完美主義”會偷走人的快樂。
因為你在努力追求完美主義時，不允許自己為自己的技能、成就和天賦感到開心。你總是在吹毛求疵，永遠不會感到滿足。
你也許會怨恨別人滿足於平庸，與此同時，卻因為一個微小的錯誤而打擊自己。對小瑕疵耿耿於懷，讓你傷心和失望，不去想所有的美好和進步。
而當你放棄追求完美，你將不再深受失敗的恐懼和自我否定的折磨，你也從而更有動力去提升工作學習的效率，享受生活的美好。
There is a kind of person who seems – at first glance – to benefit from an admirable degree of self-motivation， thoroughness and drive。They are up at dawn， they rarely take holidays， they are always sneaking in an extra hour or two of work。 Their bosses are highly impressed， they are constantly promoted， their grades have been excellent since primary school， they never miss an appointment or turn in a piece of work that is less than stellar。
有一種人是這樣的，第一眼看上去，他們似乎得益於令人欽佩的自我激勵、行事周全以及行動力。他們在黎明時分起床，他們很少放假，他們總是悄無聲息地多做一兩個小時的工作，他們的老闆對他們的印象非常好，他們不斷得到晉升，他們從小學時起就成績很好，他們從不會錯過約會，也不會交出一份差強人意的作品。
We like to say that such a person has high standards； we might even anoint them with the term ‘perfectionist。’It might seem churlish to locate any problems here。 Why complain about a somewhat overzealous devotion to perfection in a troubled and lackadaisical world？ There could surely be nothing too awful about high exactitude？ What could be so imperfect about perfectionism？
我們通常都說這樣的人有很高的標準，我們甚至用‘完美主義者’這個詞來神化他們。從他們身上找問題似乎有點不太禮貌，在一個混亂不安、缺失活力與熱情的世界中，為什麼要抱怨過於熱衷於追求完美？高度的嚴密與精確能造成什麼可怕的問題呢？完美主義究竟有什麼不完美的地方？
The concern is not so much with the work of the perfectionist （its recipients are in a very privileged position） as with the state of their soul。 Perfectionism does not – tragically – spring first and foremost from any kind of love of perfection in and of itself。 It has its origins in a far more regrettable feeling of never being good enough。It is rooted in self-hatred – sparked by memories of being disapproved of or neglected by those who should have more fairly esteemed us warmly in childhood。
問題並不出在完美主義者的工作上（作為他們工作成果的接受方是一種幸運），而是他們的精神狀態。可悲的是，完美主義首先並不來自於任何對完美本身的熱愛，它源自一種不幸的感覺，永遠覺得自己不夠好，它根植於自我憎恨，由那些在童年時本該公平尊重對待我們的人卻總是不贊成或忽視我們的記憶所所引發。
We become perfectionists from a primary sense of being unworthy； uninteresting， flawed， a disappointment， a letdown， a nuisance。 So powerful is this sense， so appalling is it in its pressure on our psyches， we are prepared to do more or less anything to expunge it： working at all hours， currying favour with authority， doing twice as much as the next person – these are the tools with which we seek to cleanse our apparently shamefully undeserving selves。
我們之所以成為完美主義者，主要是因為我們覺得自己沒有價值、無趣、有缺陷、是一個失敗者、令人失望、惹人討厭，這種感覺很強大，對我們造成可怕的心理壓力，我們才會想要或多或少做一些事情來消除它：不分晝夜地工作，討好權威，做的事比別人多一倍。這些只不過是我們用來淨化那些羞愧、不配的自我感覺的工具。
One part of the mind promises the other that the completion of the next challenge will finally usher in peace。 We can be very good at pretending that our ambitions are sane。 But our work has a Sisyphean dimension。 No sooner have we rolled our working boulder up the hill than it will tumble back down again。 There is never going to be a point of rest or a lasting feeling of completion。We are – in truth – ill rather than driven。
內心的一部分向另一部分承諾完成下一個挑戰，我們就可以迎來內心的平靜，我們非常善於假裝我們的野心是理智的，但我們的努力某種程度上來說是徒勞的，我們剛把工作的巨石滾上山頭，它就會再次滾下來，永遠沒有可以休息的時間，也沒有任何持久的完成感。我們事實上是病了，而不是真的很想努力。
We aren’t interested in perfect work at all： we are trying to escape from a feeling of being awful people– and work simply happens to be the medium through which we are striving to grow tolerable in our own eyes。But because our problem didn’t begin with work， nor can work ever prove the solution。 Our real goal is not， as we think， to be an ideal employee or professional， it is to feel acceptable。 But responsibility for a sense of acceptance cannot be handed over to our bosses or customers or a ceaselessly demanding capitalist system； these will never let us rest easy because it is in their nature， without any evil intent， always to demand more。
我們對完美的成果本身沒有絲毫興趣：我們只是在努力逃避那種覺得自己很糟糕的感覺，而工作恰好成了這樣的一個媒介，讓我們可以有一種能夠容忍自己的方式。但是由於我們的問題並不是從工作開始的，所以解決的方法也並不在工作上，我們的真正目標，並不是像我們所想的那樣，成為一個完美的僱員或專業人士，而是要接納自己，但是這種接受感並不能指靠我們的老闆、客戶或永不滿足的資本主義來給予。這些不會給我們喘息的機會，因為他們的本質就是這樣，雖然沒有惡意，但總是要求更多。
We need to shift our sense of where our drive is coming from。 We are not unnaturally interested in working perfectly， we are labouring under an unusually intense impression that we are dreadful people – a problem for which working harder cannot be the answer。We need to allow ourselves to imagine that we deserved to be accepted from the start and that it cannot forever be our fault in our minds that we are not。 It is not up to us to try to prove that we have a right to exist。 It is asking too much of ourselves to have to experience a referendum on our legitimacy every time we hand in a report， every exam we have to pass， every customer we have to serve。
我們需要轉變對我們的驅動力來源的認識，我們會追求完美的工作其實也是很自然的事情，我們總是處在一種異常的強烈認為自己糟透了的印象下工作，這並不是更加努力就可以解決的，我們需要允許自己這樣考慮，認為我們一開始就應該是被接受的，並且我們腦海中不接受自己的想法，也絕不是我們的錯誤，我們不需要靠自己去證明我們有權力存在。每次提交報告、每次必須透過的考試，需要服務的每個客戶，對我們來說都是在經歷對我們合法性的投票決議，這樣的要求實在太高了。
Working well is – naturally – an admirable goal。 But it becomes a symptom of a mental perturbation when it becomes the cover for a secret aspiration to correct a deficit of early love。 We should welcome an ability to tolerate periods of laziness， not because we are congenitally idle – but because it is a sign that we have learnt to speak more kindly to ourselves and to be appropriately angry with those who could not – at the outset – accept us for who we were without a surfeit of trophies and prizes。
工作出色固然是一個值得追求的目標，但當它被用來掩蓋想要彌補早年缺失的愛的秘密願望時，就成了一種心理上的異常問題。我們應該去擁有一種能夠容忍偶爾懶惰的能力，不是因為我們天生的惰性，而是因為它標誌著我們學會了更溫和地對待自己，並可以對那些從一開始就不接受我們，沒有被很多獎盃和獎項修飾過的樣子的人，適當地憤怒。