不經意間在網上看到了2017年BBC推薦的必讀書目，其中美國著名小說家米歇爾斯通（Michel Stone）的《Border Child》（邊境孩子）深深的吸引了我。
2017年特朗普上臺後，準備把幾十萬墨西哥移民趕回老家，並下令沿著美墨邊境修築“長城”，以阻隔從墨西哥向美國偷越邊境的非法移民。這些措施給大批的墨西哥“追夢人”帶來災難性的打擊。斯通適時創作了小說《Border Child》，用發生在赫克託（Héctor）和莉莉婭（Lilia）身上的故事，真實呈現了那些絕望的移民們所面臨的困境 。作者洞悉人性，整本小說扣人心絃，值得一讀。這裡把第一章的部分內容，嘗試著譯成中文（水平有限難免有錯誤），先睹為快，可能不久的將來中譯本會問世。
故事的引出
赫克託和莉莉婭曾是一對年輕的情侶，他們懷著對家庭美好未來的憧憬，渴望到美國去追夢。赫克託先行一步離開了墨西哥，以便在美國找到工作和安身之所。不久莉莉婭鋌而走險，要越境去陪伴赫克託。當她冒冒失失帶著不滿週歲的女兒——亞歷杭德拉·察塔過邊境線時，與女兒失散了。現在四年過去了，但失去女兒造成的創傷卻久久不能平復。
後來，他們回到了在瓦哈卡（墨）的家鄉。在一切看似恢復正常的時候，他們卻收到一個意外的訊息：亞歷杭德拉·察塔還有可能被找到。赫克託一邊越來越多的從事違法的工作，以便賺尋找女兒的錢，一邊打聽更多有關女兒的訊息。《邊境孩子》的故事就此展開……
莉莉婭(節選)
熱氣騰騰的鹹肉湯在火上熬著，莉莉婭把小章魚切成了肉丁，正把它們放到湯中。晚風捲裹著村莊焚燒垃圾留下的灰燼，持續地穿過院子，這些灰燼著實令人恐怖。莉莉婭希望“風小姐”能改變方向，但不如其願，“風小姐”還是我行我素。
她在廚房門旁邊一個裂縫的泥罐子裡裡，採下一小枝薄荷，剝下葉子，放到嘴裡。
Lilia wished the direction of the evening breeze would shift as she diced the small octopus， dropping the chunks into the briny broth already steaming on the fire。But the wind kept its course， and the funk of her village’s incinerated waste continued to waftacross the courtyard。
She plucked a sprig of mint from the cracked clay pot beside the kitchen door and stripped its leaves from the stem then popped them into her mouth。
她不停的咀嚼，把薄荷葉嚼成滑滑的、黏黏的一團，以求緩解她的噁心。在她旁邊，費爾南多坐在地上，赤著雙腳，在兩腳之間轉動著一輛小貨車。突然他尖叫著笑了起來，正在做飯的莉莉婭放下活，抬頭看了過來。
“你看見了什麼，孩子？”
男孩指向了一隻白色的母雞，它帶著一群黃油色的小雞在灰塵裡啄食。它們啄食的地方，正在費爾南多的橡皮球那邊。那隻橡皮球一直被扔在樹蔭下面。
She chewed the herb into a slick pulp， hoping it would lessen her nausea。 Fernando sat in the dirt nearby， rolling a small truck between his bare feet。 When he shrieked with laughter Lilia looked up from her work at the fire。
“What do you see， my boy？”
The child pointed at a white hen and her butter-yellow chicks pecking at the dust just beyond Fernando’s new rubber ball， abandoned for now beneath the shade tree。
莉莉婭懷著費爾南多的時候，早上從來沒有過噁心的感覺。她的孕期過於平順，甚至她開始擔心這個孩子有什麼不對勁。一直到看見孩子，數了數孩子的手指腳趾，聽見了他的哭聲，才放下心來。他的頭光禿禿的，不像亞歷杭德拉察塔，她出生時就帶著濃密的捲髮。莉莉婭懷著費爾南多時與第一胎的感覺截然不同，她應該去想這有可能是一個男孩，但是她沒有。
Lilia had not experienced any morning sickness with Fernando。 Her pregnancy had gone so smoothly she’d worried something was wrong with the baby until she saw him，counted his fingers and toes， and heard him wail。
His head had been bare， unlike the thickly matted scalp of Alejandra at her birth。 Lilia’s pregnancy with Fernando had been so different from her first that she should have suspected the child to be a boy， but no。
她完全沒有朝這方面考慮，她認定肚子裡的孩子是個畸形兒。所以她一直沒有為他感到興奮，也沒有產生濃濃的愛意。當孩子一出生，她抱起來給他餵奶時，意外來自內心深處的感激之情卻油然而生，於是她開始在上帝面前流淚讚美禱告。
不過，這個第三胎的感覺與第一胎極為相似，幾乎每天早上都要吐，而且喉嚨裡時常有苦苦的味道。可能這個孩子會像第一胎一樣，是個女孩。小亞歷杭德拉·察塔應該快到四歲了。現在差不多四歲了。她將近四歲了，莉莉婭自言自語的說到，就是四歲了，不是將要。
That simple conclusion had escaped her， and instead she’d assumed the child inside her womb to be deformed， and she had not fully felt excitement or love until she’d held him and he’d suckled at her breast。 Only then did her tears and prayers of gratitude emerge from somewhere unexpected and deep within her。
But this third pregnancy felt similar to her first， with daily morning vomiting， and the constant taste of bile lingering in her throat。 Perhaps this baby， like Lilia’s first， would be a girl child。 Little Alejandra would be almost four now。 Is almost four now。 She is almost four， Lilia told herself。 Is， not would be。
莉莉婭每天為亞歷杭德拉察塔禱告，祈禱她平安、幸福。有些日子她卻感到希望越來越渺茫，在這段陰鬱的時光裡，她祈求上帝來懲罰自己，因為自己的信心和樂觀在減退。這些不時湧現的疑慮，她並沒有告訴過赫克託。因為她很早就學會了必須勇敢的去擔負起這一切。她渴望再次得到赫克託的完全信任，就像過去一樣。希望他能夠理解自己因為失去女兒受到了多麼深的傷害。理解她在這個不幸之中產生的揮之不去的內疚。這種內疚讓她不寒而慄，深入骨髓，瀰漫日久。
Lilia prayed daily for Alejandra’s well-being and happiness。 And on the days she felt her hope waning， at those dark times， she prayed to God to punish her for allowing her faith and optimism to slip。 These occasional， doubtful thoughts she did not share with Héctor；she’d learned long ago she must shoulder enough strength for the both of them。
Lilia ached to believe that Héctor trusted her again as fully as he ever had， that he understood the depth to which her being had been shaken with the loss of their daughter and the horrible， undeniable guilt that permeated Lilia to her marrow for her part in that loss。
她渴望告訴赫克託：“她時常走過坐落於山頂的村莊墓地，感覺那墓地在緊緊地注視著她，彷彿在告訴她‘你應該躺在這裡的死人中間，而不是在活人中間行走’”。
She longed to tell him that oftentimes as she passed the village cemetery at the top of the hill，she felt it watching her closely， as if she should be there with the dead instead of walking among the living。
在莉莉婭越境丟失亞歷杭德拉·察塔之後的幾個月裡，赫克託還在當著她的面嘲笑她。他試圖透過示之以背，來隱藏自己的輕蔑，並讓自己儘量忙於一些漫無目的的事情。但莉莉婭覺得，赫克託的蔑視無疑是在她的臉上扇了一巴掌。
For months after Lilia’s border crossing and the disappearance of Alejandra， Héctor Sneered at the sight of his wife。 He tried to hide his contempt by turning away， busying himself in some pointless activity， but she felt his scorn as sure as a slap to her cheek。
赫克託並沒有掩飾他對妻子深深的失望，他無力去撫摸她，只衝她大喊大叫。在莉莉婭看來，這是對自己的一種厭惡，甚至是憎恨，也說不準。他們過去曾是墨西哥最相愛、最深情的一對。但是，自從邊境線上刻骨銘心的一天之後，生活就全變了。當她意外的走來到赫克託身邊時，卻沒能把女兒帶過來……
Even if his countenance had not betrayed his deep disappointment in Lilia， his inability to touch her all but screamed what Lilia interpreted as disgust， perhaps even loathing。
They had been the most loving， most affectionate couple in all of Mexico until that unforgettable， life-altering day at the border， when she’d arrived unexpectedly and without their child……
譯到這裡，這本小說的故事才剛剛起了個頭，接下來會發生什麼，赫克託和莉莉婭是否找到了他們的女兒，他們的家庭又發生了那些故事，無法一一展開。透過這一小部分內容，我們可以看到作者在人物、情節的刻畫上細緻入微，心理描寫更是入木三分，把那些被川普趕回老家的“追夢人”的不幸，透過一對痛失愛女的夫妻，表現的淋漓盡致。讓人們瞭解到，在墨美邊境的新長城之外，還有類似於如此揪心的故事發生。“藩籬之外，還有人性”，不知這個長城的修建者們，有否覺察。
